Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
