Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
my liver is dry heaving
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
