don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
So squirting runs in the family.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
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