I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
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