Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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