he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
