During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.