So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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