Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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