Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize