OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
