i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
