# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
