I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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