I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
