I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I love you. Go after that dick
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize