I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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