She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
