Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
you never un-have a 4some
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