I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
