the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
