I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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