And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Randomize
