windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
