I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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