dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
40s are totally the cure
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Randomize
