i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I am mentally ready for anal.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
