you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize