i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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