i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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