My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize