i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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