dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
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