so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
