it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
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I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
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I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."