Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
