I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
