Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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