and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i jhust puked up my retainher.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
