You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
We need to get me chipped asap
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
