Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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