There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
