I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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