oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize