her vagine was all disorganized.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
