Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
