if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize