high people should be assigned attendants
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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