I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
sex in a hospital.. check
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
