My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
