even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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